Abyss!

My birthday was a few days ago.. its was soooo empty and depressing due to certain something that is boggling in my mind.. people just say..' don't emo lahh.. why sad lahh.. happy lahh.. ' that doesn't change the fact that my mind is still thinking bout the problem.. anyways.. it was just empty and dull.. i duwan to be treated special.. i duwan to be special.. i just wanna be normal.. i wan my life back.. i wan my joy back.. its all taken away slowly and VERY painfully..

Anyhow i celebrated with my bunch of friends.. went for lunch with them.. dota session even compete on who got the most birthday wishes.. night went to a suprise party which i am not in the mood for.. well.. i emo-ed there.. but sort of feel bad cause they put in soooo much effort into making this happen.. so i decided to boost up a lil.. but in the end.. we just played mahjung and went home.. nothing much.. my birthday ended just like that.. Got a weird humongous necklace and lovely optimism chart with lots of colours..

Went for JS '11 commission service in ayer tawar..funny thing is that mei-yan's mom came over and ask who is chimney and everyone near me was shocked and wondering who is chimney..thanks for the card yah..was kinda great to see them graduate.. spent quite a lot of time with them.. till i actually felt attached.. when they depart.. it felt like a part of me left me as well.. they were the temporary joy that kept me refreshed and eager to see what is in stored the next day.. but i came to realize that, that is their joy.. their family.. not mine.. as i come to think of my own js family.. things seems to be fading and it was just a smiley coated nightmare.. where the true form is out to hunt me down.. i'm lost.. losing hope.. losing will to see that things will be better if only i believe.. cause it just won't.. things are just getting worse.. I can only hope to see myself being able to stand up strong soon.. i hate being this weak.. losing to everything and everyone.. aihh..

Sorrow can leave you spending in a frame with so much gulit and pain sorrow was taken as a game but it's so much more than and emotion it's a pain love brings sorrow in the game it's like a pain calling your name sometimes that come and never goes away sorrow is based on a fear sorrow is a secret you hold near sorrow can hurt based on if it's a fear but thats basically why sorrow found you here ~Channin's Outta Here~

Pocket Monsters!

These past few days.. i sort of know how it feels to be alone and when ur career starts.. My daily routine.. wake up early.. prepare for work.. goes to work.. eat Chap Fan for lunch.. and go back at 7.. reach home.. alone.. feeling so empty.. online.. watch movie.. sleep.. that's my temporary life for me now.. soooo not fun! but what to do.. this is life.. aihh.. i duwan to grow upppp~~ :C but not all is bad! hahahaha!! My friend told me i could call the college to ask for my results! My heart was beating 100x faster! hahahaa! this is even scarier than SPM! hahaha! kept calling.. and network kept being busy!! decided not to call.. but something in me was wrongg.. i felt so uncomfortable! hahaha so call again lah.. it got through! And i PASSED all~~ wooohooo!! electrifying happiness! hahahaha! AAHHHHHH!! i'm so friggin happy and excited! *bounce bounce bounce* suppose to post this like 5 days ago! hahaha! anyways.. i'll post it now~ :D

~Channin's Outta Here~

Psycho Stalks People (PSP)

Last weekend was truly a very beezeee! Saturday morn i left at early in the morning to Kelana Jaya by LrT! Reached there quite early.. and messaged Joanne.. and she said she forgot to tell me that she is gonna be late.. -.-''! nevermind.. went to Kelana Jaya because i went to Emmanuel Methodist Church to help out in the Valentine Hi-Tea event prepare for half of the JS people that are coming for visitation.. looking at them.. makes me recall the time when I was the JS group that visited EMC! time flies! sedih gilerr! Anyways.. after worship and a lil talk.. we actually got to the surprise that Uncle bert has in stored for us! We each are given a random name to choose from.. its actually names of girls.. we are suppose to be their date.. some of us got more than one.. joshua got 3!! while i got 2! i was soooo stressed up! i really dunno what to do.. panic! And my unlucky dates were Rebecca Alfred from JS and Crystal Cheok from EMC!! Two of the Tallest Girl!! Stress.. but yea.. i tried my best to not lose my composure.. but i think i did! whoops! sucks! hahaha! it wasn't really a good date i could say.. coz they more or less talk bout korean stuff and i felt left out.. but its okay lahh.. i talk to sheepz~ but then.. got scolded pulak for being a bad date! hahaha! but nvm~ no points for that! hahaha! Date ended! Uncle bert gave a lil talk.. and he 'PROMOTED' me in front of soooooo many people! felt so 'honoured'!! hahaha! and get into small groups.. i was with Ian,Joel and Samuel! I was happy that they actually opened up their problems with me.. normally people don't becoz they just think i'm a weird guy who only plays and have no serious thoughts! hahaha!

Went to Whispering Hope after that with the JS people to join their CNY celebration! hahaha! not bad.. it was quite alot of people.. but Whispering Hope makes me feel like HOME! and i met Aunty JUDY!! sorry lahhh i forgot her name and she merajuk for a while.. aduii! hahaha! play play playy.. kinda made a lot of people laugh.. good achievement! :D *pat on my own head* After that dinner.. Alston sent me back.. He take me ronda ronda of all the ways to Whispering Hope from my direction.. so i won't get lost the next day! Thankew verry berry ferry much!

On that SUNDAY!! woke up ultra early cause i need to drive to Whispering Hope for the 1st time! Takut hilang... so i compromise and left early just in case if i got lost.. mana tau! alston your directions works! i didn got lost.. instead i got there ultra early.. hahaha! Quite a lot of people that i know and dunno attended Whispering Hope that day! When i was parking my car.. a car stopped beside me.. and asked me for directions for Whispering Hope.. it was just soooo happy that they asked me!! hahaha! After service and a lil feilowship with people.. Left to Trac HQ with the JS people.. AND DANG! i got lost again.. hahaha! when i actually reached HQ.. Sheepz and the powerful has left!! so i had to look for them again! hahaha! Went to have a lil surprise for Aunty Ling Ming's birthdayy!! :D it was FUN! hahaha! berbonding with them.. makes me feel so like them! After that.. went back to HQ to chill for a while.. then i took over Sheepz job as being a transporter! sounds cool~ hahaha! Drove them back to PD and chilled there for a while.. and drove back right after.. that nite.. was tiring SHIT! hahaha.. but no biggie! i LOVE it! find joy in it~

Well.. it started with monday again. back to class.. 1st class.. slept! then i'm awake for the next classes d~ lalala~ when i reached the practical class.. the lecturer said this! 'Its good to see you here'.. aihhh.. u know what that means.. i'm always MIA! hahaha! went back.. rest.. had dinner with my housemate.. bought a digi number.. watched harry potter.. chatting.. bla bla bla.. and that is how my valentine day WENT! awesomeee! and it is now 3.20am!! and i'm blogging! Sleeping in late !! no biggie~ ngek ngek ngek! Signing out now! Tootles Doodling Noodle eating Poodle~

~Channin's Outta Here~

Dyslexia!

Sometimes simplicity is need to make things a lot easier rather than taking all those hard long terms that are pointless.. the main point is where you achieve at the end point.. :D This is what i learnt after i watch '3 Idiots' its a hindi movie that is really awesome.. i actually shed tears watching the show.. how awesome and powerful can true friendship be! I wan a friend like Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad or also known as Phunsukh Wangdu!! Seriously awesome show lahh.. can't say how much this show has taught me bout friendship and how we believe in our actions can make a difference!! ITS A MUST WATCH!! 9 out of 10 rating! can't give it a 10 cause its still a hindi movie with hindi song singing and changing clothes and dancing scenes! hahaha!

Anyways, yesterday was hype with the sheep song that i heard from uncle bert during JS Reu! it is just so funny and nice at the same time.. i miss Sheepz~ i miss BRA!! I miss Toto!! I miss Shawn! I miss JS!! aihhh~ sedih aku~ hahaha! The song is below for viewing and sing-a-long! hahaha!

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2011/2/10/nation/20110210212210&sec=nation <-- Anti-Valentine Campaign.. What is up with this man.. i just don't get it.. Its not even a holiday or in the calender.. why is there something to go anti about.. this is just a lil too much.. so everyone!! STAY STRONG!! STAY UNITED!! BERSATU TEGUH BERCERAI ROBOH!! Got any comments bout this.. do let me know.. i'm kinda interested to hear what u have to say bout this! hahaha!

Anyways! back to a lil humour! I was talking to a genie.. and we were talking bout having a seahorse as a pet.. and i wished for a seahorse.. then the genie disappeared.. and i wondering what is the genie doing.. hmmm... then appear again.. gave me a link.. i click it.. and i saw the title is sea horse and it was an image.. so i was expecting the pictures that are cute and awesome seahorses but then i got the shocked of my life.. and laughed my ass off! hahaha! soon you'll see.. Enjoy the Seahorses that i expected and the sea horse i was gave!

Cute Seahorse 1

Cute Seahorse 2

Ultimate Sea HORSE! *awesome genie*

I♥ SeaHorse!

Nylon .67mm

Recently.. i got a virtual 'slap' in the face.. and things are cleared to me.. the 'slap' was like the hurricane that came and swept all the things away.. crushing everything that was built.. crushing all the tight tension that was there.. but hey.. look on the bright side.. the hard and painful part is over.. its time to start fresh.. learn from the mistakes.. gave me a second chance to relive the lil 'city' of mine~ hahaha! things are starting to look up again.. really God has a plan for everything.. there was a cause for everything.. :D i dun see it just yet.. but i trust that He will guide me through it.. ;D Today i was shocked when an ol' fren of mine threw me a bible verse.. She gave me Jeremiah 29:11 that says "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." woaa.. that scared the living crap out of me(the good way).. i knew her for quite long d.. she used to come church.. but also once in a blue moon.. i thanked God that she is growing a lot spiritually when she came to kl to study.. she's now attending church regularly and CG.. Amen for that! :D

Hey there now all you Bruno Mars fans.. using his songs for charming girls and all.. I'm guilty of this as well.. but we was so blinded by the things done by the media.. In the video down below.. check it out.. that is how this song really should be!! I apologize for misusing and being so blind!! ^ . *

~Channin's Outta Here~

Baby Dumbbell

It is gonna be a-okay says people.. but it just ain't.. i'm beaten down.. i'm losing the battle.. i'm losing it again.. i'm breaking down.. i'm tired.. but can anyone understand how tired am i? People always see me as a carefree guy that has no problem with friends.. but that IS my biggest problem.. i'm tired of trying to please people.. trying to find a conversation for every conversation.. i'm tired.. my handphone has been out of credit for a few days.. and since then my phone has be quiet.. i'm just starting to think and wonder.. do anyone really care? and is my efforts trying to keep the strings for friendship close to me just a waste of time? gimme a break.. i try to hard to build a super good social life.. but i think it just keep failing.. even this CNY.. i was the one who destroyed the party.. of all people.. the least expected one for i was the crazier one.. not anymore.. i guess i just ain't fun.. i just am an annoyance to people.. always being left behind since young had made me treasure friendship.. but at the same time.. making me numb and cheating myself that its alright.. well the truth is.. its not.. don't i deserve a lil recognition and attention sometimes.. i'm not a teddy bear.. i'm not a ball.. i'm really tired.. i'm losing my battle to my happiness.. i dunno what is it in me that is lacking.. but i really do care for you.. u are always there in my mind no matter where and when.. please tell me that u know and u feel the same.. pretty please.. i need you.. i am dying inside out each time i see you with him.. take care girl..

~Channin's Outta Here~

Red Shiny Bookmark!

Chinese New Year this is just not what isn't the same as it used to be.. My siblings aren't around.. the mood isn't there.. only me and my parents this year.. its just not the same.. i felt lonely and i felt my parents sadness.. imagining them when they are alone when i'm in kl.. its just hard and really sad.. so i urge those who are the youngest.. remember home when u go to kl.. although kl is much fun and all.. your parents misses you really bad.. even tho they might say its okay to not come back.. make the effort to come back.. its your own actions that makes it sentimental and sincere.. nothing in this world is worth your parents.. not the fun.. not the clubs.. not even friends are even able to be compared with your parents.. ANYWAYS! sorry for running away from topic! Didn really spent much time with my relatives or my cousins.. more with friends this year.. tried resisting gambling for a few times.. but just yesterday.. got forced to gamble at my ex-teacher's place.. but just played small.. so its just for fun.. :D Been too busy to reply people anyways..watching movies, playing and chilling with friends till 4-5 am.. is just fun... i wonder will we be this close after we've got our own gf and stuff.. will our brotherhood still hold? and i just realize something.. listening to songs will actually affect what we type.. hahaha! listening to winter sonata is making me write insecure stuff.. AAHHHHHH!! This Cny learnt alot.. learnt to play mahjung and jinrami.. hahaha! its fun!! good and bad lah.. i miss my friends.. all of them went back to kl d.. left lonely ol' channin here in sitiawan..

~Channin's Outta Here~

Jigaloo!

Chinese New Year's Eve is just a lonelier one this year... brother is not around.. sister is not around.. no one to fight for good food.. no one to to to to.. err.. no one to mess around with lor.. Tuan Yuan Fan only got 3 people this year.. boring siot! working on a new year's eve is actually not bad lah.. had some fun also. hahaha! Had a break in the evening and go find a self proclaiming Coconut! it was really quite funny and fun going out with coconut and nutcase.. :D Went to eat coconut jelly~ and that's where she got the name coconut.. then we went to the beach... had a lil photo session.. all weird poses and stuff.. had a video that will remind us.. that we are crazy.. hahaha! T^T no jutjitsu class.. was looking forward to it.. After having dinner with my uncle.. i left to look for coconut again.. the awkwardness was so intense cause i sort of crashed their reunion! and hey it isn't totally my fault.. the relatives came AFTER i came.. how was i suppose to know.. D: anyhows.. i received some angpows there and i felt so ashamed to take.. THANK YOU UNCLE AND AUNTY!! Happy Chinese New Year!! anyways.. went for the All's Well End's Well movie at 11.. it seriously is super FUNNNEEHH!!! *ngo zang hai jip sao em tou lorr* hahak! then went to friend's house to play cards and crap.. and now its 3.38! i'm almost dead.. friggin exhausted!! :D Sitiawan was colourful tonight! full with exploding rainbows and polluted air!! :D awesommeeee!! And thank you all for the sweet and thoughtful CNY wishes! Its the lil things that makes life much much more meaningful! :D

Fireworks~

Galactic Fireworks!

~Channin's Out Of The Building~